Where Did the Strawberry Plants Go??

Spring has finally arrived at my house in full force. Flowers and trees are blooming, the grass is starting to turn green. We've got radishes, onions and lettuce about an inch or so high in our garden. And yesterday....it was 80º!!!!!

As we've walked around the yard looking at our fruit trees and bushes, we've noticed that the blueberries and the raspberries have lots of new growth as do the cherry and peach trees. If God blesses, we will have much fruit to give away, can and freeze!

There is one fruit that is doing exceptionally well and thankfully, it is one that we all love VERY much....strawberries. Our plants have spread and they are looking fantastic.....or they were looking fantastic I should say....DH is very upset....he doesn't like it when things don't go right in his garden....

Pictures are better than words so...

The before...


The after....


The culprit.....



RUN BAMBI RUN!!!!!

Studying...Created to Be His Help Meet

With today's post, we will have completed our study of Created to Be His Help Meet. Even though I've read through and studied this book before, I have gleaned new things and reinforced old ideas. I pray it's made me a better help meet to the man I've been blessed with.
I hope you've enjoyed this study and that you, too, have a better understanding of why God gave us this most wonderful calling on our lives.....Help Meet.

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 24: Heirs Together in the Grace of Life

Think about Sarah. Abraham's wife. Do you recall that twice in the Bible we are told that Abraham lied and put Sarah in a situation that he told her to lie as well. Lying is as wrong as wrong can be..we know this and no one will argue that point. Sarah knew it was wrong as well, but still she obeyed her husband.

Abraham did this not once, but twice...and Sarah obeyed him.

Tough stuff.

But Abraham was God's man, though not a perfect man, and he and Sarah are recognized in Hebrews 11 as great examples of faith.

"It was by faith that Abraham obeyed when God called him to leave home and go to another land that God would give him as his inheritance. He went without knowing where he was going. And even when he reached the land God promised him, he lived there by faith—for he was like a foreigner, living in tents. And so did Isaac and Jacob, who inherited the same promise. Abraham was confidently looking forward to a city with eternal foundations, a city designed and built by God.
It was by faith that even Sarah was able to have a child, though she was barren and was too old. She believed that God would keep His promise. And so a whole nation came from this one man who was as good as dead—a nation with so many people that, like the stars in the sky and the sand on the seashore, there is no way to count them."
Hebrews 11:8-12, NLT

Our husbands are imperfect men married to imperfect women. This we know and understand.

But there are seven tools listed on page 286 that will allow us to enjoy our marriage and our husbands:

Joy, Thankfulness, Contentment, Reverence, Submission, Prayer, Believing God's Word.

Putting these things into practice may not give every wife her idea of a perfect marriage, but I truly believe it will give her God's idea of a godly marriage...and wasn't that the point of this study anyway??

"The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord."
Proverbs 18:22, NLT

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/ Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 23: To Obey or Not To Obey

We have well covered in previous chapters that even when a wife knows her husband is wrong, even when everything in her knows a bad decision is being made, that we are to be obedient, faithful help meets to our husbands. Why? Because the calling on our lives is to be a proper help meet to our husband...not to point out his faults or bad mistakes. He will answer to God for how he led his family and treated them, just as we will stand before God and answer for how we lived out our role as help meet.

However, there are a few instances when obeying our husbands will be met with a no.
Jesus made it very clear in Matthew 22: 21b “...give to Caesar what belongs to Caesar, and give to God what belongs to God.” (NLT)

We are to obey the laws of the land whether we like it or not. However, if the law goes steps out of it's sphere of authority...for example, requiring that we teach our children that homosexuality is not a sin, then we are allowed to disobey.

In talking about our husband's sphere of authority the same can be said, "Render therefore unto your husband that which is your husband's and unto God the things that are God's" (This is stated by Mrs. Pearl's husband, Michael) In other words, your husband will ask things of you, as I said above, that you know may be a wrong decision. Or he may do things that you don't agree that is for the best, your role as help meet is to be a godly example before him even when he is wrong. However, if he asks you to have unnatural sexual relations, you are to turn him down. If he asks you to watch pornography with him or asks others to engage in sexual relations with you, you are to turn him down.

If he asks you to commit a crime, no matter if it's "small" or "big" you are to turn him down.

If he is abusive, towards you or your children, turn him in.

The Pearls encourage women who live or have lived in these type situations to take the proper steps and notify the authorities when necessary, but they also encourage wives to continue to be a help meet to those same men in hopes that 1Peter 3:1 may give birth, "In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives."

In other words, after notifying the authorities, continue to be a godly wife to your husband showing him love and support, edifying him to his children so that he may be won to God.

I am so blessed and cannot imagine living in an above situation, but if the above describes you, please feel free to e-mail me. I would love to pray with and encourage you.

Next week: Heirs Together in the Grace of Life

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/ Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 22: Obedient to Their Own Husbands

I want to begin by echoing a comment made by Mrs. Pearl in this chapter. She has been accused of having it easy to be an obedient wife, because she has this amazing husband. She agreed. She does have an amazing husband, but he is not perfect. He can have a temper and can be quick to jump irrationally. He's not always a joy to be around. My man is the same way. I'm very blessed to be married to a very gentle soul, but let me be the first to tell you that he's not perfect. I've seen tools go sailing through the air because they weren't helping accomplish his goal. I've heard him bellow from the gut when something isn't going the way he needs it to. I've seen him be short with the kids because they were louder than he thought they should be----and you know what....I'm guilty of those same things.

Quite honestly, this subject of being obedient to our husbands could go in a million different directions. It's my desire that you understand what God's Word says about this.

" For wives, this means submit your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything."
Ephesians 5:22-24, NLT

"Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting for those who belong to the Lord."
Colossians 3:18, NLT

"But there is one thing I want you to know: The head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God"
1 Corinthians 11:3, NLT

There are many more verses, but it's plainly clear that our husbands are the head and we are to be in obedience to them. We cannot argue with the Word.

What if your husband isn't saved? God addressed that as well...

"In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands. Then, even if some refuse to obey the Good News, your godly lives will speak to them without any words. They will be won over by observing your pure and reverent lives. Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty of fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes. You should clothe yourselves instead with the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God. This is how the holy women of old made themselves beautiful. They trusted God and accepted the authority of their husbands. For instance, Sarah obeyed her husband, Abraham, and called him her master. You are her daughters when you do what is right without fear of what your husbands might do."
1 Peter 3:1-6, NLT

You see, obedience to our husband is of the utmost importance whether or not he is a believer.

Next week's lesson will be very important to those who are living in a situation that makes obedience totally impossible. We will address when, as wives, we are not to be in obedience to our husbands.

Next week: To Obey or Not To Obey

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/ Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 16: To Be Discreet

We often think of being discreet as the ability to do avoid saying or doing something that may offend someone else. Mrs. Pearl did a little digging though and found that the word "discreet" actually means...."Prudent; wise in avoiding error and in selecting the best means to accomplish a purpose; circumspect; courteous, polite, honest dealings."

In reading this definition, I find that I'm pretty sure I'm missing it some areas, so let's see what we can do to change those things.

1) Seek to be Courteous

It is always important to make sure that we consider the other person's feelings. We should always make sure that we are treating others as we want to be treated.

While reading this I was taken back to a time in my life when telemarketers would call our house and I would either A. Answer with a really bad attitude, cut them short and then hang up while they were still talking or B. I would answer the phone and then hang it back up without saying a word.

Now, after conviction and prayer, I realize that the person on the other end of that line is just trying to make a living. They are just trying to pay their bills and provide for their families. They are just doing their job. So now, I do one of two things..A. I just don't answer the phone (caller ID) or B. I answer with a pleasant voice, wait for a lull in the spiel and politely tell them I'm not interested. Yes, sometimes I have to repeat myself a couple of times, but at least I'm not being rude.

2) Seek to be Honest

This may seem pretty self-explanatory, but it goes beyond don't tell a lie. It means don't manipulate a situation so that it will benefit you. Don't take home extra ketchup and salt from the bins at the fast food restaurant. Don't keep that extra change the cashier gave you and go back in and pay for that item you overlooked in your buggy and managed to get out of the store with without the alarm going off......yes, a couple of weeks ago I "stole" a video for about 12 seconds. Yes, I ran back in with my red face and confessed my sin and paid for the video. Yes, the cashier looked at me like I'd lost my mind for coming back in and being honest....isn't that so sad.........

3) Seek to be Gracious

Whenever your man does something to bless you, be pleased, be happy, enjoy the blessing. If he does something that is normally "your chore", just bask in the fact he loved you enough to do it. Don't point out the lump in the bed, the corner of dirt he missed or that the folded the towels backward.

He did what he did to bless you because he loves you..let that soak in.

Our challenge for this week is to take the list of the words below and mark an X by each one you feel you are lacking in. Then write out beside each word what you are going to start doing that will bring you closer to becoming what God desires of you.

*Chaste *Quiet Spirit *Prudent
*Sober *In subjection *Good
*Modest *Obedient *Discreet
*Shamefacedness *Kind *Keeper at Home
*Meek *Virtuous *Gracious

Next week: Chaste

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/ Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 16: To Love Their Children

The title of this chapter may be a bit misleading. You may think that we're going to talk about how to love our children, but on the contrary--of sorts. Remember this book is about being a better help meet, so.......

Mrs. Pearl asks the question, "How do you love your children?"

The answer? Love, honor, obey and forgive their daddy.

We are told in Proverbs 22:6, that we should, "Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old, he will not depart from it." (KJV). As mothers, especially those that stay at home, much of that training falls on us. When our husbands leave for work, they are trusting us to not only run the house: wash laundry, clean, cook, etc, he is trusting us to train his children.

Think about the word train. When you train for something, you learn about it. You learn how to do whatever you are training for. With our children, training them means to show them how, teach them. Help them learn how to make a bed, wash laundry, cook a meal, show love and respect and anything and everything else that goes with growing and living. Yes, sometimes it's tough. Yes, sometimes it's exhausting, but it's what we are commanded to do.

There is a time and a place for tv, videos and yes, even certain video or computer games. But nothing can replace baking cookies, learning how to make a bed, sweep the floor, take out the trash, fold the laundry--all by Mama's side.

Nothing is better than snuggling down, after making and enjoying lunch together, with a good book. Nothing is better than sitting down around the dinner table and enjoying conversation and laughter and catching up with each other's day.

Nothing is better than hugging their daddy and giving him a big kiss when he gets home from a hard day at work. Nothing is better than fixing him something to drink and taking the time to look him in the eyes and ask him how his day was and truly listening to him. Nothing is better than encouraging those children to be quiet and respectful when Daddy gets home from work and telling them why--because he works so hard to take care of us.

All of these things and so much more is training our children to be the future husbands and wives---help meets--they are called to be.

This week Mrs. Pearl encourages us to never do anything at home without a "buddy" beside us. She also encourages us to stop many times in a day just to play with or talk to our children. If you have older children, as I do, send them a text or an e-mail to encourage and uplift them.

Next week: To Be Discreet

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 16: To Love Their Husbands

Today's topic covers a subject that may be uncomfortable to many women. I tried very hard to address this in a polite manner. It is not my intent to offend, only share.

I found myself asking what does loving my husband mean to me?

For me, it means making sure his needs are met. This covers everything from meals on time, clean uniforms, a clean, organized house, well behaved kids when he gets home from work and intimate time frequently.

In this chapter, Mrs. Pearl addresses this very issue..intimate time with our husbands.

She shares with us from Ephesians 5:31,

"As the Scriptures say, 'A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.' " NLT

United into one. This is only going to come from being intimate with your husband.

I'm sure you've noticed in your own marriages that when your husband is satisfied sexually, things just seem to be....better.

For men, sex is a great stress reliever and it is also one of the ways that they show their wives they love them. Maybe it's the most important way because a husband who has been refused by his wife time and time again, begins to believe that he's not man enough to keep her satisfied.

Satan will begin to feed him lies that if she's not making love to him, she's got to be "giving in" to someone else--even if this isn't true.

As a woman and wife, it sometimes seems that sex is the cure-all for everything where a man is concerned. What I've learned through Mrs. Pearl's book, is that I'm not too far off course.

A man who truly loves his wife knows that after a terribly stressful day at work, the intimacy with his wife will not only relieve his stress, but it will also remind him that everything he is dealing with is so worth it for this woman who only desires to please him.

Husbands also know when their wives aren't "there" 100%. They know when they are getting a half-hearted effort from their wives. This may be okay for a short time, but there will come a moment when half their wife isn't enough.

Most godly husbands are loving and considerate enough to know when their wife is exhausted because she's had one child running a fever, one child throwing up and two more running wild because Mom hasn't been able to give them her full attention. He loves her enough to lay down with her at night and just hold her while she falls asleep. But he is also wise enough to know when she is just making an excuse every night of the week.

Mrs. Pearl encourages wives to view sex as a ministry to their husbands. I had never thought of sex as a ministry. She asks us to think of the times that we've ministered to others--by making meals, watching children or whatever. We come away so totally blessed because we tried to bless someone.

Then she asks us to look at blessing our husbands intimately the same way. By taking the initiative to minister--to set the mood, do something out of the ordinary--we will find that we, as wives, will come away from that private time just as satisfied as our man--maybe more so.
Our challenge for this week is to make personal plans on how we are going to love our husbands. She suggests doing something that we don't normally do or have never done before. She also encourages us to read the Song of Solomon this week.

*** There is an exception to this rule of being intimate with our husbands---sexual perversion. On page 174, Mrs. Pearl tells us that there are certain acts that are wrong and not natural for our bodies. She quotes Romans 1:26-28 as our guideline for this. If you would like to discuss this area a little further, please e-mail me and I would be glad to share what she's written with you.

Next week: To Love Their Children

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/ Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 2: Titus 2

Chapter 15: To Be Sober

This week begins Part 2 of our study, Created to be His Help Meet. We will begin studying Titus 2, which, in my opinion, is the model for us women as wives.

This chapter is titled, To Be Sober. What does it mean to be sober? Webster's gives a couple of definitions. The most obvious is to not be drunk. However, taking into context what we are talking about, this is the definition Webster's gives: 1)Quiet in demeanor 2)Free from excess 3) Showing self control 4) Rational.

Wow.

That alone give us cause to stop and reflect on ourselves while thinking about Titus 2:4a, "That they may teach the young women to be sober." KJV

So, according to the definition of sober, a sober wife ceases to be loud and boisterous, extravagant, indulgent and irrational. No longer single, a sober wife will consider the needs of her husband.

Instead of spending wildly (which I've been guilty of in the past) she will show self control by some rational thinking and spend the income wisely buying what's needed and respecting her husband's decisions concerning that.

I love the way Mrs. Pearl words the wife's job, "She becomes the acting CEO of a great enterprise of which her husband is the owner." (page 147)

Mrs. Pearl shares a letter from a woman whose husband came home from work one day and instead of asking his wife how she was or how her day went (she'd been sick and many household chores didn't get done) he began asking why this wasn't done or when supper would be ready. He was selfish and insensitive to his wife. She asked Mrs. Pearl what was she suppose to do, reward this insensitive man??

Well, I have to agree that in my flesh, it would have been on. Mrs. Pearl pointed out though that we, as wives, are still required to do what God has called us to do...honor our husbands. Two wrongs don't make a right and an argument can't survive unless it is being fed.

It is very important for wives to plan. We truly need to simplify and plan out our days so that when those unexpected things come up, we are prepared. We are reminded on page 148 that if our husbands failed to plan on their jobs, they would soon be unemployed.

We are encouraged to use our crock pots. This, to me, is one of the greatest inventions ever. Get that meal going in the morning and supper is one less worry in the evening. Most men don't need 7 course meals. They are happy with some homemade chicken soup and fresh bread. Life doesn't have to be extravagant to be wonderful, but less stress..that's a must.

On page 155 is a list of things titled:

How to be a Good Wife Today

* Have dinner ready--I can't think of any man that isn't grateful for that meal waiting on him when he walks in the door

* Prepare yourself--Taking just a few minutes to touch up your makeup and comb your hair will make you feel better..and believe me, your man will notice!!!

* Clear away the clutter--Right before your hubby gets home, go through the main part of the house and pick up those things that are laying around. Again, less stress.

* Prepare the children and minimize the noise--When it was time for my hubby to get home, the kids were allowed to greet Daddy with hugs and kisses, but then they were to go to their room for 30 minutes and play quietly while Daddy rested and unwound and I finished our meal. Dad was then more than ready to enjoy those babies!!!

I try very hard to work my schedule around my husband's. I am home when he is home and run any errands or do deep cleaning when he's at work. If he wants to go out, he brings it up....even if I'm dying to try the new restaurant in town..he works hard to support our family and my schedule is flexible to his needs.

Mrs. Pearl encourages us to think of a time that our husband hurt our feelings or made us angry and we responded wrongly. She asks us to write the story down the way it happened and then to rewrite it with the alternate ending with the way we should have responded to our man. Hopefully in seeing it on paper, this will encourage us to think before we react in the future.

Next week: To Love Their Husbands

Thankful Thursday

It's Thursday and time to join up with Sonya over at Truth 4 the Journey for Thankful Thursday. It's a time we set aside to list five things that we are truly thankful for.

It is such a blessing to be able to share what I am thankful for and rejoice with you in how God has blessed you as well.

Click here to join us in sharing the faithfulness of God!!!

Here are my thankfuls for this week......

1) I am thankful that we had an incredibly blessed Christmas. With so much negative going on in our world, all I could do was look around and thank God for His blessings and faithfulness.

2) I am thankful for a super wonderful three days away with my husband. We celebrated 26 years of marriage on the 16th and I can honestly say that I'm more in love with him today than I was 26 years ago. Speaking of DH........

3) I am thankful for the Christmas gift he gave me. I'm a bear at Christmastime when it comes to giving money and/or gift cards as gifts. There is nothing wrong with that and in many cases, my teens prefer that..it's just something I, personally, don't like to give or receive. So, when I opened my gift from DH...I found, you guessed it..money. Knowing that he knows how I feel about that, I was slightly caught off guard until I read the letter that went along with it. The basic jest of the letter was that my DH had actually listened to something I said while we were away for our anniversary. I mentioned that I'd love to have a girls weekend, just me, my mom and DD. He gave me the money to do just that and in 2 weeks, we're off!!! How super is that man of mine!!?

4) I am thankful for answered prayer concerning DD's new job. She starts Monday at the hospital (where DH works). She will be working in Dietary in a management position, 40 hours a week with benefits and a substantial raise. There have been a lot of problems and some moral issues where she is currently working and this was a total God-send for her.

5) I am thankful for my warm, dry house. Here where I live, it is rainy and cold..typical winter..and going to get colder in the next week. I tend to take a warm, dry house for granted..not thinking about it because it's my life and where I live, but when I'm lying in bed at night and I hear the rain pelting against the window and the wind blowing all around..and I'm all snuggled under the blankets with DH's arms wrapped around me, I'm gently reminded of how truly blessed I am.

" O God, we give glory to You all day long and constantly praise Your name."
Psalm 44:8, NLT

Just Catchin' Up...

Since my posting has been so sporadic of late, I thought I'd take a minute just to catch you all up!!...

DH and I had a wonderful time in Gatlinburg!! It was so nice to just have that one on one time with each other. You don't realize how important that time is with your husband until you actually take the time to do it. You don't realize how crazy busy you've gotten...so busy that even meaningful conversation has taken a back seat.

If you don't already, let me encourage you to take regular time with your hubby just to reconnect. You don't have to go away for a few days, you can take a walk together, go out to dinner (or breakfast, or whatever works for your schedule). You can put the kids to bed early...it doesn't matter what you do, just do something to make sure that you and your hubby have some time just strictly for each other.



A story to share..it reminds me that we've got some awesome teens....

DD and DS decided to get a bite to eat at a local restaurant while DH and I were out of town. They enjoyed a great meal and had a wonderful waitress. They paid their bill and when it got time to leave the conversation went like this:

DS: "What about the tip?"

DD: (Lays a $20 bill on the table)

DS: "I'll match it!!" (Lays another $20 bill on the table)

They leave, slowly, watching to make sure that their waitress buses the table. She does. As they walk by the huge window out front, the waitress looks up at them with tears in her eyes. DD and DS move on to the next store (they were in the mall). Just a few minutes later the waitress catches up with them, gives them a hug and tells them, "Thank you so much!!" and she runs back to work. What a wonderful blessing my two gave someone right here at Christmas!! Let me tell you, this Mama heart is proud!!!

Finally...today is an awesome special day...today my baby turns 17!!!! Oh he is such a miracle and such a blessing to me. You see, he shouldn't be alive. Had God not intervened, this would be a day of sadness instead of celebration.

There is no doubt about when we conceived this man child of ours. We were planning our next child and was coming off of birth control, but using other means of protection while we were waiting for the birth control to get out of my system. Well....let me just say that DS is the poster child for the "There is No Such Thing as Safe Sex". About 4½ months into my pregnancy, my doctor told me out of the blue that he felt we needed to do a sonar. Okay. We were curious about whether we had a boy or a girl, so...no big deal.

As we lay their watching the screen and listening to the nurse things were going just great. Then she became very quiet and began getting really serious about her job. After several minutes, she shared that this little boy we were waiting on had no kidneys and no bladder...but she guessed I just wasn't as far along as we thought. She sent this news and DH and I back to my doctor.

My doctor reviewed everything and looked at us with those all-knowing, all too serious eyes and told us what the plan was. In two weeks I would come back for another sonar, if it showed the same, he would send me to a different hospital with some specialists who would do what was needed to prepare our son for a kidney upon birth...should a donor be available. If there were no donor, then upon birth, our son would die.

Needless to say, I fell apart and through his tears and own turmoil, DH tried to be strong. As we prepared to leave the doctor's office, Doc put his arm around me and reminded me that, "We know Someone bigger than this".

Two weeks of praying and waiting found us back in that same sonar room with that same nurse.

Nurse: "Well, let's see now...here's his head, see his eyes? And here's his spine..look at that little heart just beating away..and look!!!!! There are two kidneys and a bladder and they are functioning perfectly!!!!!!!! See, I told you, you weren't as far along as you thought!"

Us: "No mam!!..that's all God!!! Only He can make organs and put them where they belong!!"

Back in my Doctor's office there were tears all over again, but this time tears of shear joy and thankfulness to a God Who has big plans for this child.
So....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY ZACHARY!!! I love you SOO much!!!!




By the way, a few months after he was born I learned that Zachary means "Touched by God"...how fitting.....

Studying...Created to Be His Help Meet

Last week we ended Part One in our study of Created to be His Help Meet. Before we move ahead into part two, I'd love it if you'd take the time to look over what we've already studied and see if there are any questions you'd like to ask or if there is anything you didn't understand or feel like we should study a bit deeper.

I've gotten some wonderful comments and questions from many of you and I hope that I've been able to encourage you in your role as help meet to your husband.
Looking forward to hearing from you!!!

Happy Anniversary!!!!

Today finds me in Gatlinburg, Tennessee celebrating my 26th wedding anniversary.

26 years ago today I said "I do" to my best friend and I've never regretted it.

Oh, there have been times over the years that have been really tough. There have been times when both have us wondered how we got ourselves in 'this mess'

There was a time when the "d" word was spoken and sought after and only by the grace and mercy of a great God, did in never come to pass.

We've known times of lean and times of plenty. We've known sadness and happiness and total and complete surprise.

We know what it's like to want a baby so badly and not be able to get pregnant easily and we know what it's like to get pregnant with only 1 try.

In 26 years, we've lived a lot....and there were a few times when it wasn't living, but shear survival....but..

I've walked through it all with God on one side and Philip on the other and there is one thing I know for certain....

I wouldn't want it any other way.

Happy Anniversary to my husband, my lover, my best friend....

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 1: The Help Meet

Chapter 14: Kings and Kingdoms

We all know and agree that Adam was created first.

We all know and agree that God told him to rule over every living thing and he was to be over woman as well. In that, it stands to reason that most likely the only place he will ever 'rule' over, is his house.

I found it interesting that Mrs. Pearl pointed out that when the President comes to town, even if he's not liked in that area, there is still a lot of preparation that goes into welcoming him to that city. When he gets there, he is treated with respect...not because he necessarily deserves it, but because of the title he holds.

She likened our husbands to being the 'president' of our families. God has given him the role of 'head honcho' and we, as wives, are to welcome him home and have it prepared in a way that will please him and give him respect because of the title God has given him, even if he hasn't truly earned it.

Some may think that being submissive to your husband shows a sign of weakness, but believe me, it's the farthest thing from weak that I can think of. I am a very strong willed woman and I don't give in to submissiveness easily. It is something that for me is very often hard to do. There are many times when I submit because it's what God has asked me to do...not because, hey! that's the way I'm wired and I'm just tickled pink to do it!

However, do not think you can just do for him and not put the emotion behind it. A man can quickly tell if you're reverencing him because it's what you're called to do, or if you're reverencing him because you love God and are totally committed to both of them.

Sometimes it may not seem 'fair' to hand over all of this reverence to a man who hasn't earned it, but remember, God has required our husbands to love us so we should ask ourselves this question....have we earned the right to be loved? I can only answer for me and let me honestly say, there is no way that I continually earn....or even deserve....his love. There are just times when I truly don't deserve it.

Mrs. Pearl makes this statement, "A man will allow his woman many, many faults, as long as he knows that she thinks he is great." This is not a right or wrong thing, this is simply the way God created man thing. Our man wants to be our hero, our reason for getting up in the morning. If he knows she is thankful for him then it won't matter as much how she looks or how clean the house is or whether or not dinner has been burned...he's going to be crazy about his perfect woman because she is crazy about him.

Finally, in this chapter Mrs. Pearl quotes Elisabeth Elliot: "The very heart of reverence is extreme appreciation and profound thankfulness that this man, just as he is, has chosen to love me, just as I am."

With this chapter we have reached the end of Part One. Next week we will begin Part Two which will take us into the book of Titus, chapter 2. Now that we have studied and understand what the true meaning of a help meet is, it's time to actually learn how to put Titus 2 into practice.

Next Week: To Be Sober

Studying..Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/ Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 1: The Help Meet

Chapter 13: The Great Mystery (Part two)

Do you find yourself often picking out the faults in your man and focusing on them? Be honest. Sometimes..yes, I do. It's so easy with our husbands and even with our children to look at the things they did that don't please you rather than the things they did that do please you. Why do you think that is? Maybe we've set our standards impossibly high, or maybe we require more of others than we do of ourselves. Whatever the reason, I believe the cycle of focusing on the negative can be broken.

It begins, again, with a change in our thought process. How would we feel if our husbands were constantly picking at the faults in us?

"Honey, the bread is delicious..but you got the top a little too brown."

"Sweetie, I can't believe how you pulled this party together on such short notice, but you forgot to sit the sugar out by the coffee pot."

"Baby, you do such a good job keeping the laundry done, but I really wanted to wear the brown pants that I wore day before yesterday. I really wish you would pay better attention!"

I don't know about you, but with those few statements, a fuse would be lit under me that would quickly ignite into a huge explosion!!! Yet, I'm afraid that is what many husbands listen to on a daily basis.

It's time to realize that a good marriage means looking past the faults of the one we love and quit trying to change him. We have to learn and live under the authority that God has placed us as wives in. That doesn't mean that a man who is lazy and unwilling to support his family deserves the blessings of a godly wife, he is just receiving the overflow of a wife willing to submit to what God has called her to. Remind yourselves, ladies, that we are not doing this study to 'fix' our husbands, we are doing this to learn to be godly help meets.

In reality, most men love their wives and children. They take pride in them and will do everything in their power to provide for them. They want women they can trust with their secrets. Women who will keep their homes clean and ready for his buddies to drop by at a moments notice. They want a woman who will keep their secrets, their dreams and who will encourage them instead of nag. Men who have a woman like that at home, will rarely be looking at 'the grass on the other side of the fence'.

Mrs. Pearl encourages this week to:

1. Show our husbands noticeable respect at least three times a day.

2. Look up the word reverence in the Bible. Mrs. Pearl says that eight times reverence has to do with men. Reading this will help us understand from God's Word what God requires of us.

Have a wonderful week watching the change in your man as you openly show him respect and admiration!!

Next week: Kings and Kingdoms

Being Transparent.......

I know I promised a Created to be His Help Meet post but life has a way of happening.

Anyone who has visited my blog for any length of time knows that being a Biblical wife is my highest earthly priority. So now I'm going to be a bit transparent.....

This morning, my sweet husband let me know that there are a few areas that I'm "dropping the ball" so to speak. It was hard to hear and hard to deal with because submission is an area that I must work on sometimes minute by minute. It doesn't always come easy.

First of all, to my hubby...I'm sorry.

Second, in light of what I've learned, I'll be taking a short break from blogging. I won't be doing daily posts again until December 1st. If God puts something on my heart to share, then I'm sure He'll also allow the time I need to do the post. I hope you'll understand and know that I'll miss each of you, but I will be back soon.

Do check in and see if there has been any action going on.

I do pray that each and every one of you will have a blessed Thanksgiving. I pray that you will truly take the time to slow down, look around and truly be thankful for the bountiful blessings you have.

With Christ's Love.....

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 1: The Help Meet

Chapter 13: The Great Mystery (Part one)

Have you ever thought about your relationship with your husband in comparison to the Church's relationship to Christ? The Church is to be obedient, reverent and submissive to Christ. Think about these requirements and think about putting them into action as wives toward our husbands.

Mrs Pearl defines each for us:

1. Obedience: doing what you know the other person wants you to do.

2. Submission: your heart giving over to the other person's will

3. Reverence: more than just doing what a man expects or demands. It is an act of the woman's will to treat him with a high degree of regard and awe.

She reminds us that all of these are acts of the will, not something that comes naturally or easily. Willing yourself to do something requires discipline on your part.

She shares with us a letter from a woman who was married to a man who frequented strip clubs and prostitutes. She really wanted a divorce and everyone she met agreed that she should get one except for one couple. This couple shared with her what God's love truly is. She decided to honor God so she stayed with her husband. She shared that it wasn't easy in the beginning and she did cry and complain a lot. But as God's love is working through her and her husband is making progress. She states that there are days when she'd still love to "wring his neck" , but she is believing God and His promises.

Mrs. Pearl tells us that this "creep of a husband is the fortunate recipient of honor being given to God." Even if this man never comes to the saving knowledge of Christ, this wife will be rewarded for her obedience to God through her husband.

Mrs. Pearl asks us to reflect on our thoughts about our husbands. How many times in a day are our thoughts negative? If he forgot to take out the trash or pick up his dirty socks, do we go over that again and again in our mind, tearing down our husbands and building up a pretty mean attitude within ourselves? Remember if we focus on the negatives, we will spew negative out of our mouths.

He forgot the trash? Instead of being negative, just take it out yourself and while you're doing that change the focus from the fact that he didn't take it out to he deserves to rest after a hard day of working a job that supports his family.

Didn't pick up those socks? Pick them up and thank God for the precious feet that hold up the man that goes to work everyday and supports his family.

See? Just a simple change in your attitude will totally turn the situation around.

Next week: The Great Mystery (Part two)

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 1: The Help Meet

Chapter 12: By Divine Appointment

Mrs. Pearl begins this chapter by quoting 1 Corinthians 11:3,

" But there is one thing I want you to know: The head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God." NLT

She reminds us that the only place we will ever find true fulfillment is as a help meet to our husbands. We have to remind ourselves, maybe often, that it's not our place to correct our husbands...he will answer to God someday for his choices just as we will. For those who don't know the blessing of a saved husband, Mrs. Pearl says this, "It takes faith in God to trust Him when all you seem to see is one carnal man leading you--to 'God only knows where'. "

We have to remember as wives that the submission to our husbands is not the most important thing. The most important thing is being faithful to what God says in His Word. Obedience to GOD is the most important thing we can do.

Mrs. Pearl points out that man's fall into sin was because of the vulnerability of woman. We have to agree with that. Yes, I know, I'm sure Eve didn't sit on Adam and shove that fruit down his throat, but she did partake first. Why do you think satan addressed Eve and not Adam? I believe it's because, like it or not ladies, we are the weaker sex, in many ways.

Before the fall, God created woman to be the help meet. The help meet to a sinless man.....after the fall though, God didn't change His mind about the man being the authority, but the consequence of sin made it so that woman now had to be in submission to a man with a sin nature.

She also addresses the Scripture that states,

"Women should be silent during the church meetings. It is not proper for them to speak. They should be submissive, just as the law says. If they have any questions, they should ask their husbands at home, for it is improper for women to speak in church meetings."
1Corinthians 14:34, NLT

Now, this is a can of worms, I know. I realize that there are awesome women of God who are teaching all over the world. I have been blessed by many. However, personally, I cannot sit beside my husband or any other man for that matter under a woman pastor. My personal belief is that the man is to lead in all areas. I do not give "my two cents" at church or any other place for that matter. I talk to my husband in private, give him my concerns and should he deem them worthy to be brought to the attention of others, he'll do so...if not, it's laid to rest and that's the end of it. I trust him to value my opinion and weigh what I'm saying or what I think honestly. I also trust God to convict him if he 'blows me off'.

Please understand that being in this total submission, we are not backing up. Like Mrs. Pearl, if you knew me personally, you would see that I'm not a quiet, calm person. I'm very opinionated and I want to be heard and acknowledged when I open my mouth. If I disagree with something, I'm willing to let you know it.....loudly. However, my love and respect of God won't allow me to be that way with my husband on purpose. When I do let go and "do it my way", conviction is swift.. and I'm very thankful for that!

Our challenge for this week is just that, a week long challenge:

Monday: Write three new things that you will add to your life that will cause you to become more precious to your husband.

Tuesday: List three things that you can do that will be a help to him.

Wednesday: Write down three things you can do that will be an encouragement to him.

Thursday: Jot down three things about your appearance that you can change, which he is sure to like.

Friday: List three tings that you can do to your house that will please him.

Saturday: Write three things you can do (for example, intimate time together) that will make him feel like his is THE MAN.

Sunday: Plan three ways you can respond to him in front of others that will show a heart of respect and honor toward him.

Please don't just make this list, DO it each day. You will be amazed at the wonderful man you find you are living with, within one short week.

Let me know how it works for you!!!!!


Next week: The Great Mystery

Join Me at the Well!!!

Hey everybody!!! Just wanted to pass along that I'm over at the Well today!!

How about dropping by, saying hi and seeing how important it is to Know Your Man!!!

Studying...Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 1: The Help Meet

Chapter 11: The Nature of Man and Woman (part 2)

Last week, we went over the very different nature of men and women. This week we are going to define if we are a Jezebel or a Ruth. Interesting, hmmmm???

What do you think of when the name Jezebel is mentioned? I know what I think of....

Years ago as a little girl, if I overheard one of my grandmothers say, "Oh that ________ is just a Jezebel", I knew that ________ was not a very good person. Even as a little girl, not knowing the story of Jezebel, I could tell by their tone of voice that Jezebel was not someone I wanted to be like.

Going back to the Biblical Jezebel of 1 Kings, we realize that she had taken on the role of leader in her relationship with Ahab. Ahab was a weak man and instead of Jezebel being a Biblical wife and meeting the needs of a quiet man, she stepped into the leadership position and decided to "lead" him into becoming a man's man.

What she didn't know, or care to know, was that by becoming the leader, she made her man feel even more inadequate. She was not encouraging him at all to be the man of God he was designed to be.

Now, what do you think of when you hear the name Ruth?

I think of someone who is humble, dedicated, faithful and loyal.

How about Esther?

I think of someone who was submissive to her husband, dedicated to her Lord and knew, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God's way was the best way and that the only way to handle a situation was with prayer and fasting.

Then there is the Virtuous Woman. I used to call her Superwoman. You know her...the one that lives at Proverbs 31. Her husband can trust her, she greatly enriches his life and she does him good and not harm. (v. 11-12, NLT)

Her husband trusts her to trust him. He knows his secrets are safe with her and she'll never turn those things shared in private around to get her own way or to belittle him. He shares his dreams with her, no matter how impossible they might seem, and she will encourge him and cheer him on.

One thing I have never noticed in all my years of reading Proverbs 31....not once is her ministry mentioned. Not once is her prayer life mentioned. Not once is what she is doing for the Lord mentioned. Now we know how incredibley important these things are. God has made the importance of a relationship with Him and obedience to Him very clear. Understand that I am NOT taking any importance away from our relationship with God, however, remember we are discussing being a help meet to our husbands---our God-given calling on our lives.

Our Virtuous woman is busy making sure her husband is happy, her children and her household is taken care of. She makes sure the finances are in order and she's staying within their budget. She works beside her husband. She provides good sex and fun company. She makes sure things are taken care of so he can relax and enjoy the time away from his job. She puts him above herself. (page 115)

A woman who complains or tries to assert her authority over her husband dishonors him. There is a time, place and way to acknowledge certain things that will enable us to appeal to our husbands without challenging his authority. (Mrs. Pearl covers this later in the book).

We want our husbands to love and cherish us. We want him to look at us, laugh with us and have fun with us like we did when we were dating and in the early years of marriage. We want him to be relaxed and happy and a joy to be around when he's at home. If those are the things we want, then wouldn't you agree that it begins with us?

Mrs. Pearl asks these questions:

1) Is your desire toward your husband?

2) Dor you live to please him or do you expect him to live up to your convictions and whims?

3) Do you spend you days in angry frustrations over his unwillingness to change to your specifications?

4) When people think of your family, do they see your husband as the principal player or do they think of you as the main character?

The first command that God gave woman is found in Genesis 3:16b:

"And you will desire to control your husband, but he will rule over you."
NLT

Next week: By Divine Appointment

Thankful Thursday

It's Thursday and time to join up with Sonya over at Truth 4 the Journey for Thankful Thursday. It's a time we set aside to list five things that we are truly thankful for.

It is such a blessing to be able to share what I am thankful for and rejoice with you in how God has blessed you as well.

Click here to join us in sharing the faithfulness of God!!!

Here are my thankfuls for this week......

1) I am thankful for the breakthrough that God sent my way yesterday. It has been a long several months in my 'fight' with God. He requiring more than I'm willing to give. Me asking for things He can't give because of my disobedience. But yesterday while hanging out in Proverbs and 2 Timothy, God got through this thick skull and I release, repented and gave in.

2) I am thankful that after giving in to my Father, it wasn't very long at all until, while I was sitting at this computer checking some things and listening to some praise music, that I felt a warmth all over me and I knew without a doubt that my Father had reached down and wrapped me up in a big hug....I really needed that!

3) I am thankful for another successful I Care Ministry Sunday and the chance to meet the most precious 89 year old woman that I've ever seen. She was a true blessing to me...and I was there to be a blessing to her!!!

4) I am thankful for the sweet, sweet comment that my DH left on my Help Meet post this past Friday. This man of mine is the best gift God could have ever given me on this earth!!

5) I am thankful for the open communication between me and my teenagers. It's not always been easy and sometimes it's been a downright tug-of-war to keep those lines open, but I know it's been worth it every time I hear, "Mom, can I talk to you?"

"Sing to the Lord, all you godly ones! Praise His holy name."
Psalm 30:4