We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at http://www.nogreaterjoy.org/
Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.
I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.
Part 1: The Help Meet
Chapter 12: By Divine Appointment
Mrs. Pearl begins this chapter by quoting 1 Corinthians 11:3,
" But there is one thing I want you to know: The head of every man is Christ, the head of woman is man, and the head of Christ is God." NLTShe reminds us that the only place we will ever find true fulfillment is as a help meet to our husbands. We have to remind ourselves, maybe often, that it's not our place to correct our husbands...he will answer to God someday for his choices just as we will. For those who don't know the blessing of a saved husband, Mrs. Pearl says this, "It takes faith in God to trust Him when all you seem to see is one carnal man leading you--to 'God only knows where'. "
We have to remember as wives that the submission to our husbands is not the most important thing. The most important thing is being faithful to what God says in His Word. Obedience to GOD is the most important thing we can do.
Mrs. Pearl points out that man's fall into sin was because of the vulnerability of woman. We have to agree with that. Yes, I know, I'm sure Eve didn't sit on Adam and shove that fruit down his throat, but she did partake first. Why do you think satan addressed Eve and not Adam? I believe it's because, like it or not ladies, we are the weaker sex, in many ways.
Before the fall, God created woman to be the help meet. The help meet to a sinless man.....after the fall though, God didn't change His mind about the man being the authority, but the consequence of sin made it so that woman now had to be in submission to a man with a sin nature.
She also addresses the Scripture that states,
"Women should be silent during the church meetings. It is not proper for them to speak. They should be submissive, just as the law says. If they have any questions, they should ask their husbands at home, for it is improper for women to speak in church meetings."Now, this is a can of worms, I know. I realize that there are awesome women of God who are teaching all over the world. I have been blessed by many. However, personally, I cannot sit beside my husband or any other man for that matter under a woman pastor. My personal belief is that the man is to lead in all areas. I do not give "my two cents" at church or any other place for that matter. I talk to my husband in private, give him my concerns and should he deem them worthy to be brought to the attention of others, he'll do so...if not, it's laid to rest and that's the end of it. I trust him to value my opinion and weigh what I'm saying or what I think honestly. I also trust God to convict him if he 'blows me off'.
1Corinthians 14:34, NLT
Please understand that being in this total submission, we are not backing up. Like Mrs. Pearl, if you knew me personally, you would see that I'm not a quiet, calm person. I'm very opinionated and I want to be heard and acknowledged when I open my mouth. If I disagree with something, I'm willing to let you know it.....loudly. However, my love and respect of God won't allow me to be that way with my husband on purpose. When I do let go and "do it my way", conviction is swift.. and I'm very thankful for that!
Our challenge for this week is just that, a week long challenge:
Monday: Write three new things that you will add to your life that will cause you to become more precious to your husband.
Tuesday: List three things that you can do that will be a help to him.
Wednesday: Write down three things you can do that will be an encouragement to him.
Thursday: Jot down three things about your appearance that you can change, which he is sure to like.
Friday: List three tings that you can do to your house that will please him.
Saturday: Write three things you can do (for example, intimate time together) that will make him feel like his is THE MAN.
Sunday: Plan three ways you can respond to him in front of others that will show a heart of respect and honor toward him.
Please don't just make this list, DO it each day. You will be amazed at the wonderful man you find you are living with, within one short week.
Let me know how it works for you!!!!!
Next week: The Great Mystery