Friday, December 4, 2009

Studying..Created to be His Help Meet

We are studying the book by Debi Pearl, Created to be His Help Meet. Through our study of this book, we are going to learn what it means to be a help meet and actually living the role that God created us as women to fill. I've read this book once before and applied many of the things that Mrs. Pearl spoke of, and it has transformed an already good marriage into nothing short of awesome!! I encourage you to purchase this book and follow along or at the very least, check out the Pearl's website at Any text taken directly from Mrs. Pearl's book will be highlighted in blue.

I realize that in studying Created to be His Help Meet at the rate of one chapter per week, we will be doing this study for approximately 24 weeks. We could go at this at a much faster rate, but I believe that if we truly want to change and fill our God given rolls as help meet to our husbands, then we need to take things slower and put into practice what we are learning. I hope you agree and stay the course with me as we become better help meets together.

Part 1: The Help Meet

Chapter 13: The Great Mystery (Part two)

Do you find yourself often picking out the faults in your man and focusing on them? Be honest. Sometimes..yes, I do. It's so easy with our husbands and even with our children to look at the things they did that don't please you rather than the things they did that do please you. Why do you think that is? Maybe we've set our standards impossibly high, or maybe we require more of others than we do of ourselves. Whatever the reason, I believe the cycle of focusing on the negative can be broken.

It begins, again, with a change in our thought process. How would we feel if our husbands were constantly picking at the faults in us?

"Honey, the bread is delicious..but you got the top a little too brown."

"Sweetie, I can't believe how you pulled this party together on such short notice, but you forgot to sit the sugar out by the coffee pot."

"Baby, you do such a good job keeping the laundry done, but I really wanted to wear the brown pants that I wore day before yesterday. I really wish you would pay better attention!"

I don't know about you, but with those few statements, a fuse would be lit under me that would quickly ignite into a huge explosion!!! Yet, I'm afraid that is what many husbands listen to on a daily basis.

It's time to realize that a good marriage means looking past the faults of the one we love and quit trying to change him. We have to learn and live under the authority that God has placed us as wives in. That doesn't mean that a man who is lazy and unwilling to support his family deserves the blessings of a godly wife, he is just receiving the overflow of a wife willing to submit to what God has called her to. Remind yourselves, ladies, that we are not doing this study to 'fix' our husbands, we are doing this to learn to be godly help meets.

In reality, most men love their wives and children. They take pride in them and will do everything in their power to provide for them. They want women they can trust with their secrets. Women who will keep their homes clean and ready for his buddies to drop by at a moments notice. They want a woman who will keep their secrets, their dreams and who will encourage them instead of nag. Men who have a woman like that at home, will rarely be looking at 'the grass on the other side of the fence'.

Mrs. Pearl encourages this week to:

1. Show our husbands noticeable respect at least three times a day.

2. Look up the word reverence in the Bible. Mrs. Pearl says that eight times reverence has to do with men. Reading this will help us understand from God's Word what God requires of us.

Have a wonderful week watching the change in your man as you openly show him respect and admiration!!

Next week: Kings and Kingdoms


Collette@Jesuslovesmums said...

Challenging words and this resonates so much with me!
Love Collette xxx

Andrea said...

You have an award on arise 2 write.

Stacie, A Firefighter's Wife said...

What if you are the one being critized constantly? It is very hard when you live with it all the time. Just keeping it real, here. It isn't always the woman who nags and critizes everything, but can be the man.

I like what this says, but would like to know what you think? I'll check back here for discussion.

Pam, mom, honey, said...

i love this book. i am going to take the time to look back through your blog at all your notes