Tuesday, March 30, 2010

I Really Would LOVE Your Opinion!!

I'd like to get your opinion about something....There is a debate of sorts going on in my home.

Four people have four different opinions and I'd really like to know what my readers think.

I've been a stay-at-home, homeschooling Mom for over 18 years. After salvation, my husband and I agreed that the place for me to be was at home raising our children.

Together we made the decision to homeschool and we have been thoroughly blessed over the years. We have no regrets.

Our youngest graduates in May and our oldest works full time. I may have the opportunity to go back to work. Since I've been out of the workforce for over 18 years I realize that I'm not skilled for many jobs and this opportunity would be something I would really enjoy.

Our finances are such that we don't have to have the extra money, but it would be used to become debt free quicker, to build savings/retirement up and yes, to enjoy.

DH is all for it since we no longer have "school-age" children that need my full attention. DD is adamantly opposed, believing whole-heartedly that women are to be at home---period. DS is okay whatever decision is made. Me? I'm torn. I'm not against going back to work, but I am struggling with the aspect of being a keeper of my home.

Ultimately, I will be in obedience to my husband, because I fully believe that I am in submission to him and I fully trust that he loves me as Christ loves the Church.

What do you think?? Should I go back to work? Should I stay home? What are my options??

Waiting to hear from all of you........


Parsley said...

I was just talking about this since we have only 4 more years with our daughter being homeschooled.

I think I'd only want to work part time or perhaps take some more college classes. (I already have a degree.)

On the other hand, it leaves you open to help others. Meals on wheels, church committees, visiting the elderly....God can use you in a volunteer position too.

Mary R. said...

Of, course, I know you will pray about it. If you still feel peace, you can try the job for a while. You can always quit, you know.

Having a job is different that being career obsessed, where you don't care for your home properly.

I have worked part time on and off since my decision to stop working outside the home full time.

Every now and then, an opportunity to work part time outside the home will come up, or I will feel the need to do so.

If you husband is ok with it and you feel peace, you can try it. If it doesn't work out, you can quit. Sometimes that his how we learn things, and/or get them out of our systems if they are not meant to be for us.

I was always blessed in having these part-time jobs working for women, and being able to take time off when I needed to in order to look after my husband and children.

For ladies with children at home, I think working should be a last resort (and I have been there); but if your children are grown, it is a different story. My opinions.

Leslie said...

I think as long as your home & family aren't suffering, it's fine to go back to work. I went back after 8 years when my youngest began kindergarten. However, I work part-time while my kids are in school; I have my summers off and two weeks off at Christmas; and my husband works from home. Plus, it's a job I have loved, and I consider it a way to minister to others. (I teach at a Christian preschool.) So we have been very blessed by how it has fit into our lives.

It seems to me that the Proverbs 31 woman worked, yet she was still able to care for her family & home. So if the job doesn't interfere with your homelife, I think it should be fine!

Chrissy said...

This is such an INDIVIDUAL decision, Deb. I know what I'd do in that situation - but what's in YOUR heart?

Do you want to work outside the home? If you do, even if it's just a few hours a week, I think you should go for it. Part-time is probably the way to go, so that you ease back into it. You can probably increase your hours later if you decide you want to work more.

I'd advise making a pros and cons list. What are the GOOD things that will come from your working outside the home? The bad things? Let that list be your guide. If the good list is longer than the bad list, and you feel like you'll still be able to maintain your home and relationships, then I say go for it!

Sandy said...

Hey, Deb. I just got home from my employment outside the home. Now my work at home begins. Let me preface my comments by saying that this decision is a very personal one, and it is one to be made between you, your husband, and the Lord.

Do I think it's okay for a wife to be employed outside the home? In general, yes. Take a look at Proverbs 31. This ideal woman was a wife, mother, home manager, AND a business woman who worked outside her home. I think it can be God's calling for a wife to be employed outside the home. However, having said that, I'd like to add that there are many women who do not have the organizational skills, the time management skills, the discipline, or the emotional strength to handle dual-employment. It's not for everyone. The fact that your children are grown is another point to consider. Some of your parenting responsibilities are changing now, and this allows more time for other activities or employment. Your employment can be a blessing to your husband--another way to be a helpmeet for him. Something else I'd like to clarify is what "keepers at home" means. I admit that I have not checked this out personally, but I once read a Bible study that said "keeper at home" means "guardian of the home." That makes a lot of sense to me--but like I said, I haven't personally verified this. No matter whether we are employed in or outside the home, we have a responsibility to guard our homes, make them safe places for our families to live and love and learn God's truth. Keepers at home does not mean "keep her at home." (Sorry, couldn't resist the little pun.)

Enough said. I truly believe this is a personal decision to be made carefully and prayerfully with your husband and the Lord. God bless you as you seek His will.

Jane In The Jungle said...

I just don't know...I think you've been a wonderful example for your daughter...I wish I had you to instruct me in finding joy in the homemaking. I know that unless something unforseen happens and we need an extra income, I will not go back to work...but then my youngest is only 4, and with the 4 kids spread out the way they are...sometimes I feel I'll always have at least one at home, LOL!
What ever you decide, I know you will do what is best for your family!

Kristen said...

I think (obviously) you should do what suits your family the best. My own opinion (for my family) I think would be to (first) do what makes you happy and glorifies God. Secondly, I'd have to see if I could truly handle working outside the home AND handle my home. I think the grass is always greener on the other side...and that if you're anything like more...the more income you have...the more you spend...whereas now you probably have a good system figured out!