Thursday, September 11, 2008

Evening Chaos

I have been a wife for almost 25 years and a stay at home mom for almost 17 years. I'd like to think that I've learned a bit over the years about evening chaos.

You know what I'm talking's 4 o'clock and it's time to get supper going. You are tired after a day of homeschooling, cleaning house, doing laundry, running errands, etc. You haven't even thought about what to make for supper, one child is wrapped around your leg, another is crying...well, maybe even screaming...or coloring on the house (that really happened to me!). Dear hubby just called to let you know he's on his way home and he is exhausted. He can't wait to get home and you look around and say to yourself, 'Come home to this!!?'

I have one of the most patient, loving husbands I know of. He doesn't say too much about the way I school, or run the household, or shop. He's incredibly patient with me and thinks I'm beautiful whether I'm all dolled up or in sweats, t-shirt and a pony tail. He is completely in love with Jesus Christ and sold out to his children. I'm a very blessed woman. But....there are a few things he expects (and more than deserves) after a hard day at work.

He is over the maintenance department at our local hospital so his days are filled with problems and you name its that need immediate attention. Someone is always having a crisis. When he comes home he wants a cold drink waiting on him and his newspaper sitting by the couch. Please understand this same man tells everyone hi when he gets home, wraps me up in a big hug and kiss and asks how my day was. In the 17 years as a SAHM though I've also learned that..

1. He's tired. He's been solving problems all day long and the last thing he needs to hear when he hits the door are the problems I've had all day long. Not that he thinks my problems aren't important..but I've learned that if I'll give him 30 minutes to unwind, he's rested and his thoughts are cleared and he's more able to listen.

2. He's tired. Even as teenagers, and sometimes more so, our home can be very loud. The kids used to "attack" dad at the door with a quick hug and then telling on their brother or sister. So, I sat down one day and explained to them how blessed they were to have such a great Daddy and when he comes home from work we should let him have a few minutes to unwind. We began by setting a timer for 30 minutes. When Dad would get home, they could great him with hugs and I love you's, but then they had to go to their rooms until the timer beeped. Then they could come out and hang with Dad. This also got the kids separated so any disagreements they'd had during the day were soon forgotten.

3. He's tired. While he's having his 30 minute sabbatical and the kids are having their 30 minute sabbatical, I'm able to work in the kitchen and finish preparing supper. We're able to sit down together and enjoy a meal, catch up on our day and it's a peaceful, blessed time for our family.

Don't believe this will make a difference in the evening chaos and a wonderful change in dear hubby??....give it a shot. I challenge you for the next 2 weeks to try it. I can almost guarantee that your husband will think he's coming home to a wonderland.

As a little extra..take 15 minutes and pretty yourself up. Comb your hair, wash your face or touch up your makeup, spritz on a little perfume...hubby already believes you're beautiful...but make him even more glad he's home!!


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